of seduction

So when she looked into his eyes and found the look of poetic lovers lingering therein she made the only choice available to her unenlightened mind and confused experienced treachery for sincere emotion. And to her palpitating heart she told the lie that when morning comes she will not love him any more or ever again because she knew all her heart desired was to not regret the moment where it knew right from wrong and let her make the choice.
And then he traced the map from here and now to eternal memory upon her cheek, making sure to linger along the fringes of her lips without quite letting her taste the salt of his skin, in the process making her soul move inside of her in an act of violent desperation that felt somewhat like an earthquake that shook her right off her defenses and into and onto the mercy of his rhythmic seduction, which irrespective of how vehemently she wished would last forever could only last as long as her desire to be swept away upon the frail and fickle wings of assumed love consumed her.
In the pit of her stomach, along the fault lines beneath her womb but above her hungry core, an entire troupe of nymphs danced in gleeful surrender to the silent music of answered prayers causing her knees to give way and her bones to ache with an ancient and unknown distress which healed as it hurt, perhaps just to make sure that no scars remain, no wounds, so even if she would never have to wonder where those golden sunsets went, and that pitch black darkness of expectation without reason, she would not crumble beneath the weight of her own conscience.
This is when he chose to allow his fingers to dance the slow methodic waltz of barely curtailed passion upon her supple and eager flesh and this is when her heart stopped beating in time to the rhythm of life and danced instead to that of lust. In every consequent moment that his hands traversed the hills and valleys of her form, she felt the agitated calm of passion being ignited and satiated, sinking ever deeper, down to that empty space at the center of her existence which existed in order to complete another in order for it to complete her. She had not known the nature of this vacuum before this moment and in this moment she made the convenient assumption that it had existed for him alone and that he was the culmination of all her anxieties and all her restless nights and all her sinful dreams which made it incumbent upon her to bless her baths with holy verses in order to purge herself of the rapture of those dreams that lasted much longer than their residue or the innocent delirium of sleep.
Upon her skin danced his fingers and beneath it a fire that had been lit long before but without direction or purpose, as if by accident, or divine intention in waiting for the most perfect of moments to expose its hidden agenda and it was in this fire that she set herself to burn because as it grew in its concupiscent fury so did the relief which had its roots in her womb and its branches all across the universe.
In silent mockery of modesty, she smiled almost without smiling, with a coy awareness of the magnitude of the distance between what she had been and what she was about to become, and without even the slightest vestige of grandeur or any illusions thereof she allowed him to free her of the restrictions of morality which encumbered her body with cloth and hide to suffocate the spirit which was yearning to return and to forever remain in the state of absolute ignorance of everything and everyone and all the peripheral anxieties that come along with them. She had secretly yearned for didactic inspirations to abandon her and in the moment when his life line stretched across her heart they finally did, setting her free upon the world of hedonistic inspirations with the reckless abandon of a cannon ball hurled unto an enemy.
His lips marked hers with the indelible and invisible scars of beginnings and as soon as she felt their enthusiasm rob her of her breath she understood that as soon as she made him surrender to her sensibilities his heart would break and along with it the spell which they both found themselves enraptured in and which transcended every inhibition worth harboring. At that very moment she knew that she would never break his heart, that she would never want for him to stop because she understood that much like her happiness too is eternally fickle.
His entire being acted like a single instinct stretched across the horizon of infinite possibilities to perform as a unified orchestra of numerous machines of pleasure with her as the sole purveyor/audience/beneficiary of his efforts. However, his proficiency gave birth to an anomaly which rose from the pit of her stomach like doubt, ruptured the cocoon of complacence around her heart like fear and lodged itself inside her brain as permanently and unapologetically as regret. And it was at this precise moment that he whispered the legendary promise of poetic lovers in her ear to gain an audience with the origin of her innocence so as to transform it forever into irredeemable loss and despite the trepidation coursing through her veins along with the infinitely exponential pleasure she acquiesced to his request but in an act of unprecedented prudence and perhaps unequivocal masochism she spread open her eyes as well and found his face hovering less than the breadth of a breath away from hers, staring at her with the flaccid fascination that is the sign of a man firmly in the grip of impending satisfaction but completely devoid of the look of poetic lovers or any mutation thereof.
Almost in the exact instant as she had opened them, she closed her eyes because the sudden and unmistakable surge of pride refused to allow her the luxury of letting him witness the sorrow which had in one tremendous blow replaced all the pleasure in the moment and in the world to settle heavily upon her conscience.
And it was when he finally lay beside her, panting from the excursion, oblivious to any thing other then his own sense of fulfillment, staring up at the ceiling fan rotating too slowly to create wind or to turn back time, the sheer intensity of her anger rendered her comatose. So she remained motionless, like a little girl’s doll placed aside in a moment of forgetfulness, never to be found again, never to be claimed again, never to be dressed or combed or bathed again with the tenderness of yesterday or a few moments ago wherein she had felt simpler than ever before or ever again. Her arms lay stiff and motionless, bent in wards slightly, lost between the desire to minimize the vastness of her exposure and the futility of making such an effort now; ramrod straight she lay, unable to find an excuse to move, to get off the soiled sheets and run out the door to some indistinct place where she could be blissfully and absolutely unaware of herself.
This is when his breath found composure again, and his hunger grew anew and even more commanding than before, unencumbered as it was now by anxiety or the possibility of rejection, and bolstered further with the legendary confidence of victors, he recreated the look of poetic lovers in his eyes.
This time when she looked at him it was not his eyes as much as her smile that was insincere, for in her surrender there was no ignorance. There was no gullibility in her acquiescence but where as his motivation was pure or at least unabashed, the hidden agenda was hers to harbor. That place of absolute unawareness which she had acquired the sudden and insatiable yearning for, where she could be too oblivious of herself to be burdened with the fatigue of bearing ruthless guilt was only to be found under the weight of his sweat and amidst the grotesque symphony of his groans and inside the bittersweet embrace of her own selfishness.
So this time when his eyes fell upon hers he found in them not the innocent bewilderment of one discovering her own capacity for accepting fantastic possibilities of never ending love and infinite, self fulfilling passion but the eternally insincere look of poetic lovers. And this time it was her who murmured the legendary promise of poetic lovers into his ear and this time he was the one who believed it.